User:Da Sonic/Love

Like an Angel

First Draft

 * Thinking of her, I sat alone in my living room, staring into the wall, as if it were a screen into my mind. Her curly brown hair, big brown eyes, and beautiful smile still took my breath away. My mind wandered, from kissing her passionately, to snuggling with her in front of a fireplace in the numbing cold. She told the funniest jokes, and laughed at mine, even when they weren’t very funny.  She talked a lot, perhaps too much, but I liked it, because her voice was like music to my ears.  She had looked like an angel today, in her white hoodie, and perfectly fit jeans. I could not make this thought of her depart from my mind.


 * Sitting with her at lunch was trial enough for my brain to implode, planning out ways to tell her how I felt, and that I understood were no more than that, plans. The guts I needed to tell her simply wouldn’t rush in to make my day. The most beautiful woman that I had ever set my eyes upon was so close to me, but I could not stir up the courage to tell her so.  Yesterday, at a fall festival, I had spent a few hours with her and her friends, just talking casually, from our insane sisters, to our crazy parents, and I felt like we had connected more that day than any others before it. Still I could not work up the nerve to tell her that I simply loved her.


 * The crushes I had experienced in my short life so far could not compare to this feeling I had towards her. She was beautiful, smart, funny, nice, and best, she knew I existed. My usual bragging rights towards my friends were gone.  I could not say to her how smart I was, in all of my honors classes, because she was in more than me.  She brought out the more humble side of me, but also the more quiet part. I was at a loss of words whenever I was around her. On the other hand, the past few weeks had been pure wonder, just thinking of her put me in a good mood. The only downside was taking my tests with her sitting next to me.  She distracted me, and made me miss questions, or make stupid mistakes. She took the spotlight no matter where I went, keeping my attention hooked.


 * When I needed motivation, I thought of her. Running the mile had been easy since I started doing it for her, shaving minutes off of my time from a few months before. When I was taking a test (in a class she wasn’t in) I told myself I was going to get a good grade for her, and I did it.  Whenever I needed that little push to get something done, she was there, giving me a reason to push on.


 * Thinking of her, listening to love songs by countless bands and singers, it just made me want her more. She had stolen my heart, and I did not want it back.

Revision #1

 * Thinking of her, I sat alone in my living room, staring into the wall, as if it were a screen into my mind. Her curly brown hair, big brown eyes, and beautiful smile still took my breath away. My mind wandered, from kissing her passionately, to snuggling with her in front of a fireplace in the numbing cold. She told the funniest jokes, and laughed at mine, even when they weren’t very funny.  She talked a lot, perhaps too much, but I liked it, because her voice was like music to my ears.


 * Sitting with her at lunch was almost enough to make my brain implode. She had looked like an angel that day, in her white hoodie, and perfectly fit jeans. I could not make this thought of her depart from my mind. I was always planning out ways to tell her how I felt, all the time understanding that they were no more than that, plans. The most beautiful woman that I had ever set my eyes upon was so close to me, yet I could not stir up the courage to tell her so.  Yesterday, at a fall festival, I had spent a few hours with her and her friends, just talking casually, from our insane sisters, to our crazy parents, to the funny things that had happened to us that week, and I felt like we had connected more that day than any others before it.  Still I could not work up the nerve to tell her that I simply adored her.


 * The crushes I had experienced in my short and insignificant life so far could not compare to this feeling I had towards her. She was beautiful, smart, funny, nice, and best, she knew I existed. My usual bragging rights towards many of my friends vanished when I was around her.  I could not say to her how smart I was, with all of my honors classes, because she had more than me.  She brought out the more humble side of me, but also the more quiet part. I was at a loss of words whenever I was around her. On the other hand, the past few weeks had been pure paradise; just thinking of her would put me in a good mood. The only downside to this feeling I had towards her, was taking my tests with her sitting near to me. She distracted me, and made me miss questions, make stupid mistakes. She took the spotlight no matter where I went, keeping my attention hooked.  She became an axis for everything that I did. I could not do the simplest of tasks without my mind wandering back to her.


 * When I needed motivation, I thought of her. When I was running the mile, even when I wanted to stop so badly, I told myself I would keep running for her, and I did it. When I was taking a test, I told myself I was going to get a good grade for her, and I did it.  Whenever I needed that little push to get something done, she was there, giving me a reason to push on, and I did it.


 * She had stolen my heart, and I did not want it back.

Revision #2

 * Sitting with her at lunch was almost enough to make my brain implode. She had looked like an angel that day, in her white hoodie, and perfectly fit jeans. I could not make this thought of her depart from my mind. I was always planning out ways to tell her how I felt, all the time understanding that they were no more than that, plans. The most beautiful woman that I had ever set my eyes upon was so close to me, yet I could not stir up the courage to tell her so.  That week, at a fall festival, I had spent a few hours with her and her friends, just talking casually, from our insane sisters and crazy parents, to the funny things that had happened to us that week, and I felt like we had connected more that day than any others before it.  Still I could not work up the nerve to tell her that I simply adored her.


 * The crushes I had experienced in my short and insignificant life so far could not compare to this feeling I had towards her. She was beautiful, smart, funny, nice, and best, she knew I existed. My usual bragging rights towards many of my friends vanished when I was around her.  I could not say to her how smart I was, with all of my honors classes, because she had more than me.  She brought out the more humble side of me, but also the more quiet part. I was at a loss of words whenever I was around her. On the other hand, the past few weeks had been pure paradise; just thinking of her would put me in a good mood. The only downside to these strong feelings I had towards her, was taking my tests with her sitting close to me. She distracted me; made me miss questions, make stupid mistakes. She took the spotlight no matter where she went, keeping my attention hooked.  She became an axis for everything that I did. I could not do the simplest of tasks without my mind wandering back to her.


 * She had the cutest smile, and it warmed me every time I saw it. She smiled a lot too; always bringing out the better side of things, and was as beautiful on the inside as she was on the outside.  She gave up lots of her time volunteering for things like camps; because making other people happy was apparently her specialty.  Her hair showed two sides of her also.  She wore it two ways that I simply loved, curly, which made her look sexier than ever, and in a bun, that showed she could be as adorable as she was sexy.  Her face was gorgeous, with her freckles scattered around, which I couldn’t resist.


 * Thinking of her, I sat alone, staring into the wall, as if it were a screen into my mind. Her curly brown hair, big brown eyes, and beautiful smile still took my breath away. My mind wandered, from snuggling with her in front of a fireplace in the numbing cold, to kissing her passionately. She told the funniest jokes, and laughed at mine, even when they weren’t very funny.  She talked a lot, perhaps too much, but I liked it, because her voice was music to my ears.


 * When I needed motivation, I thought of her. When I was running the mile, even when I wanted to stop so badly, I told myself I would keep running for her, and I did it. When I was taking a test, I told myself I was going to get a good grade for her, and I did it.  Whenever I needed that little push to get something done, she was there, giving me a reason to push on, and I did it.


 * She had stolen my heart, and I did not want it back.

Alas

 * I'm over her now, but I'm gonna leave this anyways.