User:NuclearVII/Essays/Useless things

I rule that the following items are worthless.

Healing Prayers

Healing prayers are meant for redbarring.

Nobody good bothers with redbarring.

Therefore, nobody good will bother with HP.

Thus, HP is baed.

Hey, you can't argue with LOGIC.

Swords

Axes do more damage.

Scythes do even more damage at the cost of utility.

Hammers are just plain awesome with KD's.

What use do swords have? Utility? Lolz.

Swords have a dead skill spot. It's called sever.

Where a swords has to take two skills to be good, axe can take one and save spot for utility.

Therefore, axes have both greater damage and utility than swords do.

Thus, Axes > Swords.

Therefore, swords are only good for looking cute.

Anything that doesn't work well alone

Apart from emanagement skills, anything that requires another specific skill's input is worthless by definition.

it's like this...

You want a hotdog.

You go to the store, and buy 8 buns for 8$.

You spent one skill bar and 8$.

Then you buy a single hotdog for 1$.

You spent 2 skill slots and 9 bucks for a hotdog.

With 7 unused buns.

Then you realize you could've gone to the hotdog stand and bought a hotdog for 10 bucks, saving 1 skill slot.

1 skill slot is more valuable than 1$.

Same logic applies to ebon hawk, stoning, mirrored stance, meteor shower and any other gimmicky skill.

Anything that counters a specific thing

Ulcerous lungs suck. So does vocal minority.

Because nobody is guaranteed to bring shouts.

Power spike only counters spells.

But everyone brings spells.

If everyone brought shouts on a global basis on 6 chars, vocal would be okay.

But it's not.

It's niche. A deadspot.

Therefore, niche skills are worthless.

Thus, if you add niche skills to counter a broken mechanic, you are worthless.

Just sayin'.

The storyline in factions

First, you are a student.

Then a plauge ravages your school. We get that.

Then you try to find the source of the plauge. You are the hero.

At this point, I would've stayed at the school and made out with kisai.

I mean, duh?

At any rate...

You go on the clear a path through the infested city.

At this point, I would've stayed at the now cleared out city and made out with the twin sisters.

I mean, duh?

You then storm through a jungle filled with emo goths and insecure "Juggernoughts".

At this point, I would've stayed at the jungle, killed the goths, and made out with the emo chicks.

Then you slay shiro, thank you, thank you, and get a worthless green item you can then sell for 2k.

You just blew of 3 oppurtunities to made out for a green item that's worth 2k.

FAILURE.

Blood magicka

Blood magic heals you.

It also hurts your foe.

For 50 points on a good day, for 10 points on a bad day.

Lulz.

Anything that counters a specific thing

EMPHASIS.